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Happiness Is In Your Narrative

Peter Kozodoy logo Posted Tuesday May 12th, 2020 Happiness Is In Your Narrative

Have you ever been at a low in your life?

Have you ever encountered a massive roadblock that left you feeling beaten up and disappointed?

Listen, we've all been there. I remember losing a million-dollar client once. It was a disaster. I had to lay people off, including some who had been with my company for over half a decade.

I moped around for a while until I remembered one very important thing I had learned from my Forum: Happiness is in the narrative.

See, there are things that happen, and then there are things we tell ourselves about the things that happened.

Those are two different things.

For instance, you may have recently lost a big client. You can either tell yourself that you lost that client because you're a big loser, or you can tell yourself, thank goodness that client left so I can refine my process even further and prepare for even bigger success.

It takes no additional energy to change your narrative...only the willingness to see things for what they are: Opportunities.

That reminds me of when I was talking to Barbara Corcoran last year, and she told me these wise words: "The harder the ball gets thrown down, the higher it bounces back up." It was her way of saying that our lowest lows often give us the most pivotal epiphanies that lead us on to our next thing.

I've often heard that nothing is learned from success, and it's so true. Successful people have no reason to change, no reason to open their minds to possibilities. Meanwhile, as long as you're failing, you're learning, growing, and searching for more innovative ways to create your own success.

Which would you rather be? Sure, living in success sounds good, but it's also boring. Make sure you don't forget to tell yourself that part!

In addition, the difference between success and failure is often only a matter of timing, so it doesn't make a whole lot of sense to judge ourselves for where we're at right this moment. That's another narrative we tell ourselves: If we're not successful right this second, then we suck.

But that's not true, and you know it.

So, no matter whether you're having a great start to Q2 or if you're down in the dumps, remember this: What you tell yourself about where you are will make the difference between rebounding big or staying stuck where you are.

As a wise friend once told me: "It's all alright in the end. So if it's not alright, it's not the end." And that's all there is to it.

What's your narrative? Whatever it is, control it -- because only you get to control your story.